I stood in the dark house in the early part of the night swaying back and forth and intermittently bouncing and patting. "Shhh, shhh " I whispered "it's okay" But it didn't feel okay. Today was anything but okay. I'm holding back tears as I comfort my baby in the dark of the house, fearful he would wake up the toddler and what that could lead to. I begged my baby to relax his tense body. I wondered what was wrong and why he was so unsettled.
The house is dark and I should be asleep. I've been frozen with anxiety for a few hours now. I have a million things to do and I am unable to do any. I reached out to friends and shared in some conversation/distraction and then I did a quick search online for some birth affirmations. The affirmations are polished, printable, and static. I need something more interactive so my search takes me to coloring pages. These new search results cause more discomfort. Many of the images are blunt and, while meaningful, detailed. I need words. I need to focus on the letters, the phrases, the meditation of it.
I am absolutely grateful for every symptom, every run to the washroom, every nauseating car ride, every headache, every uneaten meal, and every medication I must take to get them here. I am grateful that despite how long the road has been so far, that the real journey is just beginning.
Babywearing through pregnancy has turned out to be an unanticipated challenge. With a toddler whose independence I strongly encourage, the pains and aches of late third trimester, and the close-to-home nesting, the need to wear has dropped significantly. This isn't to say that we aren't wearing at all. As an active member of a local… Continue reading Ruck with Pregnancy Support Pass
Among my mom friends we often find ourselves uttering the phrase "little people with big emotions". It seems to be not only a term of solidarity but a gentle reminder that the tantrums we find ourselves navigating with our little ones are the result of a barrier in communication. Imagining yourself in a world where not only do you not know what you are feeling but you also can't tell anyone what you are feeling or ask for help. Those strong emotions ultimately manifest in physical actions, and then we as parents get frustrated because those actions are almost always undesired behaviors. So what can we do?
Bellywrapping during pregnancy is something that has helped me tremendously in coping with pelvic pressure, lower back pain, and abdominal pains. Though different than belly binding, belly wrapping can be done in a number of ways from functional to stylish. For this pregnancy I began wrapping the baby bump at approximately 24 weeks, much earlier… Continue reading Demonstration – Bellywrapping: Sweetheart finish.
I sat on the floor and I cried. My two year old hugged me an patted me on the cheek. He did this mere moments after throwing his plate on the floor screaming "NO" and yelling at the top of his lungs. I cried because I was failing him. I cried because he deserves patience and empathy and understanding and I had significantly less than he demanded of me that day.